Creative Oxygen: Notes on Sovereignty Week #24

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Final track of this year’s Sovereignty Week album.

It had been a long time since I gave myself a writing challenge.

This year, I chose Sovereignty as my word.

Back in 2016 and 2017, I did writing challenges all the time. A writing coach of mine had me take a quote from Rumi and write every day for a month, experimenting with different formats just to see what would emerge. It was one of the best lessons I’ve had in form, flow, and finishing.

I loved it.

Writing every day changes the way you notice the world. You start paying attention to the small moments because you know they might become something later.

Somewhere along the way, I blinked — and realized I hadn’t done it in years.

So this year I decided to create a challenge for myself again.

I called it Sovereignty Week.

At the time, I was helping someone move through the slow choreography of healing from surgery — getting up, sitting down, using ice packs, and being patient. Caregiving has a way of clarifying things. It makes you think about how we help each other and how we help ourselves.

Meanwhile, I was heading into one of the busiest stretches of my year.

Our launch for the SharePoint 25 birthday digital event.

Three other events in production.

Speaking and DJing.

And being onsite in San Diego for the Igniting Excellence Summit.

So I thought: why not write too?

Writing, researching, and thinking are my zen.

Not a hashtag. Not a slogan.

A practice.

So off I went to San Diego for the Igniting Excellence Summit — and to write for Sovereignty Week.

Track 1: The Decision

Sovereignty meant something simple.

I control my boundaries.
My time.
My energy.
Who I give it to.
What I use it for.

Then I walked straight into one of the busiest stretches of my year.

Two months.

A massive digital event.

Another major event I’m producing right behind it — and two more after that.

A women’s summit during International Women’s Day and Women’s History Month - which is all year long!

The launch of a dear friend’s healthcare business and nonprofit, NobelCareAI and Sick Titties.org

Prep for a site visit.

A communitydays event, and a return trip to my home state of Michigan.

A reshuffling of senior leadership at work.

Eight to fourteen back-to-back video meetings a day, usually three to four days a week.

Camera on.
Brain on.
Decision after decision after decision.

No space to stand up.
No space to go outside.
No space to eat a real meal.

No space to breathe.

Normally, when I attend events, I’m everywhere at once.

Back of house producing. On stage delivering keynotes and leading sessions.

Reading the room.
Solving problems before they happen.
Keeping the whole machine moving.

Which means most of the time, I don’t get to just sit in the room.

But this week, I knew I needed to attend to the moment, the time, the energy, and to myself.

So I blocked my calendar and delegated.

Just enough space to sit down.

Just enough space to listen.

Just enough space to breathe.

Just enough space to make a cup of my favorite tea — Throat Coat, which always travels with me — and also write each night.

And that’s when the week really began.

Track 2: Breaking Bread

Lunch and break time at the Women’s Summit were glorious.

Women breaking bread together, laughter moving around the table, conversations unfolding without the usual rush between sessions.

Beth Leonard asked a deceptively simple question.

What are your hobbies?

And suddenly the whole table opened up.

We talked about hobbies, passions, the work we get paid for, the work we volunteer for, and the work that quietly keeps us alive.

It’s amazing how one small question can reveal the architecture of someone’s life.

That’s when Kate Coffey-Bacon said something I’m told she often says, a line that followed me the rest of the week.

Be where your feet are.

Simple advice.

But when you spend most of your days jumping from one meeting to the next, managing people and solving problems before they happen, it feels almost radical.

Track 3: Psychological Safety

Something else happened that rarely happens at conferences.

I talked to people.

Not the quick hug, selfie, “let’s catch up soon” version.

The real version.

I sat next to colleagues in sessions and told them how I was actually doing — personally and professionally.

Some of them were strangers when we sat down.

They weren’t strangers by the end.

Cass Cooper gave a talk about burnout and resilience, and I sat there quietly weeping while she spoke.

Not because anything she said was shocking.

Because it was true.

And the room was safe enough to feel it.

Jennifer Weis shared her story behind Mission Save a Life and helped us breathe, hand over heart, and stomach. Her passion could fuel a nuclear reactor.

I talk about psychological safety all the time in my presentations.

That week, I experienced it.

You can feel it in your body when a room is safe.

You breathe differently.
You tell the truth.

Track 4: Gossip Saves Lives

My friend Mary Jane Gibson recently wrote a piece called, Gossip Saves Lives.

We walked and talked about this piece recently in a magical forest moment together.

She reminded me that gossip originally meant something very different — the women you trusted enough to share life with.

Women gathering.
Sharing information.
Protecting each other.
Surviving.

At the conference, I felt this.

What people dismiss as gossip is often just women telling each other the truth.

About work.
About burnout.
About systems that weren’t built for us.
About the quiet strategies we use to stay afloat.

That kind of information is gold.

I sat with Molly Fuchsel, who asks brilliant questions and leads with empathy.

I talked with Shannon Mullins, who understands the gift of amplification and connection.

Cora Naughton gave me a beautiful Irish Blessing coin with a squeeze of her hand and a hug.

I had gorgeous moments with many women and allies over the few days. It was wonderful.

And I was so proud of Christine Bongard, president of the network, who brings heart to everything she does and is one of the reasons this event exists at all.

Events for women don’t always receive the funding or sponsorship they deserve or need. We’ve watched that window narrow — sometimes gutted entirely.

Which means the more we support each other and make sure gatherings like this continue, the more essential they become.

It’s up to us as women to show up for them, sponsor them, and amplify them. Especially when they move us.

Track 5: The Dance Floor

At one point during the event, I asked everyone to gather around my DJ decks for a photo.

Behind us was a little trailer, and suddenly I was surrounded by women from across the conference.

We snapped the picture.

Then I dropped a song.

I Will Survive. (Thank you, Tiffany Wallace, who is brilliant, and I’ve known her longer than anyone else there, thank you, SharePoint.)

The reaction was immediate.

Women screaming the lyrics.
Laughing.
Dancing.

Then We Are Family.

Then Dancing Queen.

For a moment, the whole room exhaled.

Music does that.

After a week of thinking, talking, and processing, the body finally releases what the mind has been carrying.

Track 6: Boundaries

Sovereignty also means boundaries.

And boundaries are not always elegant.

Sometimes they come out messy, late, emotional, or badly timed. Sometimes they come out like a sentence lit on fire and thrown through a window.

But the boundary still matters.

Judging the delivery while ignoring the boundary itself is a convenient way to avoid hearing what someone actually needs.

Sovereignty doesn’t mean life becomes calm or conflict-free.

It means you stop abandoning yourself inside the chaos.

And when you’re in the middle of a whirlwind, things don’t always arrive neatly packaged.

Sometimes a boundary shows up in response to hearing someone else’s truth or story, and you recognize a pattern, a fear, or a moment when something inside you finally says:

Enough.

Track 7: Creative Oxygen

And there is chaos.

Personal chaos.
Professional chaos.

And let’s be honest — global chaos too.

We’re living in a moment when the world often feels like it’s on fire.

Which makes the spaces where we gather feel even more necessary.

Those moments are creative oxygen.

The kind that lets us breathe more freely, think more clearly, and return to the world stronger and happier than when we left it.

Track 8: Showing Up

To me, every day is International Women’s Day.

But I’ll never miss a chance to show up for the women in my life — especially the ones fighting battles most people can’t see.

Toward the end of Sovereignty Week, I had the chance to support a dear friend, Kristin Nobles, who is not only fighting for her life but also fighting for millions of other women who deserve answers and care in the realm of Women’s Health.

Sometimes sovereignty looks like leadership.

Sometimes it looks like advocacy.

And sometimes it looks like something much simpler.

Showing up.

That night, I closed the week the way I know best with friends like KC Mancebo, who are brilliant and generous — behind the DJ decks, holding the vibe, celebrating the work, and us standing beside a friend whose courage is bigger than the room.

Sometimes the most powerful thing we can do for each other is just this:

Be there.

Track 9: The Puzzle

The best metaphor I’ve found for life lately is Tetris. (an arcade game I love)

Pieces keep falling.

Family.
Work.
Health.
Community.
Politics.
Music.
Writing.

You can’t control which pieces come next.

But you can learn to see the shape of the board.

And once you see the shape, the game changes.

You stop dog-paddling.

You start placing pieces intentionally.

Final Track: Lanterns

By the end of Sovereignty Week, I had written five essays.

Because writing is how I process the puzzle.

Sometimes I write my own stories.

Sometimes I write stories people tell me with the names removed.

But always for the same reason.

So someone reading will know:

You are not alone.

When women gather, we are not just networking.

We are remembering each other.

We are comparing notes.

We are sharing creative oxygen.

We are lighting lanterns for one another.

And sometimes, if we’re lucky, someone reminds us of the simplest instruction in the world.

Be where your feet are.

Protect your queendom.
Press play.

Sample

“The difference between a dream and a goal is a plan.”
Kristin Nobles

Track Notes

Sovereignty often sounds like a big word — power, independence, control.

But what I kept learning during this week is that sovereignty is often much quieter than that.

It’s deciding how we spend our time, where we place our attention, and who we gather with when the world feels loud.

When women share information, amplify each other’s work, and make space for honest conversation, something powerful happens. Those gatherings become a form of infrastructure — not just for networking, but for resilience.

Creative oxygen is what we create for each other when we slow down long enough to breathe.

Liner Notes

The Essential Rumi — Jalaluddin Rumi (translated by Coleman Barks)
The daily writing practice that started my original challenge came from reflecting on Rumi’s poetry and responding to it in my own words. Thank you Rachel.

WITCH Podcast — India Rakusen
A brilliant exploration of the history of women, power, folklore, and how the idea of the “witch” has evolved across cultures.

Radical Acceptance — Tara Brach
A grounding guide to mindfulness and compassion, especially useful when navigating stress, leadership, and the emotional noise of modern life.

Gossip Saves Lives — Mary Jane Gibson
A reflection on how information-sharing among women has historically been reframed as gossip, even though it has often functioned as a form of protection and collective knowledge.

Up Next on the Mix Tape

The Sovereignty Playlist

Because sovereignty isn’t a one-week practice.

It’s a year-long one.

And if the rhythm holds, another track may drop later this year — maybe around a birthday, maybe around another moment when women gather and the music changes.

Stay tuned.